Some people get to sail through life and I am so glad that they have a gentle journey. We have not found our lives surrounded by the gentle stuff. I could complain but if I were to be completely honest I would say without the tough stuff I would not have learned how to soften my tongue and my heart. I would not have fallen in love with Jesus the way I do today. What has been uncovered is the treasures in the darkness.
The presence of God while sitting by my son as he lay dying at 18. The absolute certainty that God is in control and that He numbered our days before we were even born. As I sat there in ICU waiting and wondering the Lord revealed the truth of Psalm 139: 13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.
Somehow the truth of the Word of God means less to me when life is going well and then comes the worst time of my life and the presence of God speaks His word to my heart and it removes the fear and the anxiousness and just fills me with His peace.
God promises abundant life and then our youngest son is removed from this life.
What is that about God? I have learned to leave the why's to God and instead ask Him what do you want me learn through this. Grief is hard work and sneaks up when you least expect it. Like grocery shopping and realizing that never again will I need to buy his favorite cereal. At the very season of David's dying I was given a grandson to treasure.
What to do now God, live in grief for all my days or celebrate his life and share with others the reality of joy in the presence of incredible grief.
It started with a dream, to give a cup at his high school in his memory, that says "I am my brother's keeper." 25 years ago now and the cup is a treasure at the high school. The David Patterson Memorial Cup. Encouraging our young folk to love each other, to care for one another here at home and it has spread to those in other continents. Who but God could have ever imagined the far reaching consequences of a grieving mother's dream.
What is that about God? I have learned to leave the why's to God and instead ask Him what do you want me learn through this. Grief is hard work and sneaks up when you least expect it. Like grocery shopping and realizing that never again will I need to buy his favorite cereal. At the very season of David's dying I was given a grandson to treasure.
What to do now God, live in grief for all my days or celebrate his life and share with others the reality of joy in the presence of incredible grief.
It started with a dream, to give a cup at his high school in his memory, that says "I am my brother's keeper." 25 years ago now and the cup is a treasure at the high school. The David Patterson Memorial Cup. Encouraging our young folk to love each other, to care for one another here at home and it has spread to those in other continents. Who but God could have ever imagined the far reaching consequences of a grieving mother's dream.
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